Why I am still awake…gotta wake up at 9.30am later

Basically woke up today and my muscles were aching badly. Drag myself to work and back. Went to visit Dentist and then indulge my trip to supermarket. Haha..

On the way home, fell asleep again because I was too tired.

I wonder should I post what happen during my internship? Hmm..

Side note I realise, maybe it's my teaching method? Parents ask to add on classes, subjects as well as introduce new customers to me. Heheheh happy cos $$$

I should probably go to sleep. Fingers cross.

I used to read those English books from Enid Blyton on those quaint cottage houses and such. Always wanted to live in a foreign country especially in New York, London, or places with quaint nature.

I wanted to write and read books underneath a fir tree having a nice picnic, looking at squirrels and such with a lake and mountain nearby.

Alas, when I grow older I realise, such dreams are difficult to attain. With reality like BTO, rent and credits, my little girl dreams have to be put on hold

It's not wonderlust but a matter of fact, finding a partner with the same mindset as you is difficult. I refuse to stick with the same old guy who thinks of BTO, investments and retire at 65 such.

It's boring..alas it's difficult to meet a person with the exact same thoughts as me. I want to live in those foreign countries, work there and set up a home there with plenty of time and space to do gardening, picnic, cooking, reading and relaxing.

Therefore I refuse. Refuse to date a person who fits exactly into the Singaporean dream. Work hard, holiday a few days, save and save and retire at 65 etc

Back to my post on internship. I am crossing my fingers on how much I can write.

Writing this when I just reach home exhausted, have not bath and sitting down on the floor.

My internship

It was at a travel agency that specialise in Thai tours. Not going say the name.

It's seems heavenly at first and I love that I am able to do a part for my fave country. ( fall in love with Thailand after my first immersion trip)

However the office politics and the turnover rate are extremely high like 6 months I work there 6 colleagues leave and new one enter.

I go from anticipating work to dragging my feet Everyday.

6 colleagues. Of them 3 I still contact them. 1 I feel guilty to.

Jac- the first girl I saw, same age as me and easier going. My twinnie haha

Fiona- my senior in dtrm.

Kate- older than me, more like a consultant and adviser to the young us

Wenhui- same batch as fiona. I don't know I like or hate her on this

Of breakups and others

Today, I had a chat with my work colleagues.. As most of them are around my age ( really pretty and dresses well unlike me) we start chatting about relationships. I lost count of how much time passes by when I am single ( don't know exact date)

They asked me if I am happy in my current mode.

I am.

To be honest I hate the person I am when I am in a relationship. I am intelligent ( at least I hope so) a modern woman.

But whenever I go in a relationship. I hate the person I become.. Insecure, crazy person. Low eq and emotional..

After all this time I still feel I am not ready for a relationship. Not that I have any lingering feelings left but I do hope when I get into a new relationship, I can be a better person.

So till then.. 👐🏻

On a side note. I am busy saving up for my trip to Taiwan. First time in 10 years.. I hope I can experience a different Taiwan 🤘🏻